Missing in inaction

As regular readers will realise, I've been a bit absent this year so far. At least from my blog that is. Truth i,s I've hit a bit of a block. Not a 'can't write', writer's block kind of block, but a 'not really sure what to write' one.

The thing is, as you know, this is a personal self indulgent little blog, where I get to write about what's happening to me, what I'm thinking and how life is faring for me. I'm generally pretty open in it, and at times I've shared some deeply personal stuff. It's what seems right to do. But at the moment, for a variety of reasons that I'll no doubt share in due course, my personal life isn't something I'm comfortable sharing with the world at the moment.

Now don't worry, there's nothing wrong. I'm perfectly ok, no bad things are happening - it's just that I'm not ready to write publicly about some stuff and that's been blocking me from writing about anything. So it was with great pleasure today that Frances (the queen of awesomeness herself) and I agreed to our latest blog challenge. So for the next while, we're going to both post at least once a week on a random topic - and not just any random topic but one drawn completely at random from a creative writing prompt website with numbers generated digitally at random for us. To make sure we don't cheat, we're both going to select each other's number and therefore topic and then we will have until the following weekend to compose our inane ramblings, sorry works of genius.

We'll be identifying our challenge posts with the title 'Random Thoughts' and I'll be tagging mine 'randomness' just in case you're ever daft enough to want to read them all.

Hopefully this will help me get back into my blogging groove. To be honest, I've missed it - you may not have done, but I definitely have. So here we go, let 2012 be the year of random!!

Limbering up

No, it's not about running. This post will be a running free zone - but just in case, you maybe want to drop by to my Just Giving page and sponsor me just to be on the safe side?

The limbering up referred to is about getting back in the blogging groove. Not now. I'm still warming up now. But soon.

To be accurate, in about 10 days, when I head off on my happy holidays and the travel blogging frenzy returns. I enjoyed it so much last year when I visited Spain  - and to my great delight, apparently so did a number of my readers. What more encouragement does a girl, especially one who's a frustrated writer, need??

Watch this space after 8th October and you can join me on my next big adventure! It will be great to have you along on the journey.

Making the most of it

So, what did I do with the rest of my long weekend? Did I mope and stress about being on my own or did I get out there and enjoy myself? Truth be told it was a bit of both - plenty to do and distract myself with, interspersed with spells of stopping to think (always dangerous I find) and starting to feel sorry for myself. But I am pleased to say, those spells were few and far between, and certainly didn't take over what has otherwise been a truly lovely day.

After a long lie and a few more pages of Beevor (check the link, guys, before you snigger knowingly!), and a light breakfast of toast and homemade marmelade (thanks Mum), I headed out into Stirling armed with my camera. I was looking for Signs and Symbols - for my entry to A Million Little Photographs - and find them I did. Perhaps not what the mind might automatically jump to, but signs and symbols all the same. And all the better for being found in and around Stirling. You'll have to wait until I've finished the challenge and had the photographs developed (yes, it's print not digital!!) before you get to see them. Hopefully there will be a few acceptable ones in there.

After that, feeling a tad on the thirsty side, I opted for my next favourite pursuit - drinking coffee. A short - ok, fairly long - stop at the Burgh coffeeshop did the trick - and also stimulated my creative juices as well. Leading to a new chapter (at last) for the collaborative book writing challenge - hopefully that will be a spur to my fellow contributors to get writing again too.

And now, I'm ending the day multi-tasking with cooking, blogging and checking out Facebook. A fairly productive day all round really!

Oh, there was some sitting around in the sun as well - but no running. I'm saving that for tomorrow morning (ahem!).

Creating space

While I was on holiday and just after I got back I blogged a bit about the thinking I've been doing about 'My Life'. Well, this is the notebook I've been writing it all down in. I bought it ages ago and haven't really used it much until now. Reading the things I'd written way back when was quite hard - most of it was from when I was trying to get pregnant.

Trying and failing that is. It took me right back to how completely devastating that time was. When the one thing I had ever really wanted was the one thing, no matter how hard I tried, that I couldn't do.

I've moved on now and while it is something I still feel incredibly sad about it doesn't cripple me to quite the same extent now. It's still hard sometimes to see a woman with a baby but most of the time it brings a genuine smile to my face, not the forced fake one I used to have to do to get by without screaming, it's not fair.

As things have turned out, it was probably for the best. I don't think my (almost) ex-husband would have coped with being a parent. And I know I wouldn't have coped with him not coping! Still, it does hurt and is the big regret of my life.


But that's not the point of this post. The point was supposed to be about a different form of creativity - my writing, even though it's only for my own consumption. It was also that I really like the motto on the front of the notebook. I liked it when I bought it and I like it even more at the moment while I think about Life and what to do with it!

Seems like a pretty good philosophy to live by if you ask me.